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divorce recovery

When to Start Dating Again: Signs You’re Ready

April 28, 20253 min read

After divorce, the idea of dating can feel like stepping into a storm—exciting, but scary. You might wonder if you’re ready or if it’s too soon to try. At Rebuilders International, we’ve spent over 40 years helping people find clarity with our proven approach, backed by the Fisher Divorce Adjustment Scale (FDAS). This isn’t about rushing into love—it’s about knowing you’re ready to connect authentically. Here’s how to spot the signs and take that step with confidence.

Why Timing Matters for Dating

Jumping into dating too early can stir up old wounds, but waiting forever might mean hiding from life. Friends might nudge you to “get back out there,” but readiness isn’t about a calendar—it’s about your heart. Our method, tested by thousands, shows that dating works best when you’re grounded in yourself. The FDAS, with its .93 reliability, proves emotional clarity makes all the difference. Let’s explore the signs you’re there.

5 Rebuilders Signs You’re Ready to Date

These signs, drawn from our 10-week workshop, use our unique tools to help you know when you’re ready, rooted in trust and self-awareness:

  1. You’re Done with “What Ifs”
    If your mind’s no longer stuck on “Why did it end?” or “Could I have fixed it?” you’re moving forward. Our free self-test checks your disentanglement score—high scores mean you’re free from past loops. A group member said, “I stopped replaying the past and started seeing the future.” This clarity, like our thinking-phase work, shows you’re ready for new connections.

  2. You Feel “I Am Enough”
    Dating from a place of lack invites old patterns. Our core belief? You’re a “gem,” whole as you are. If you can say, “I am enough,” and mean it, you’re on solid ground. A woman in our support group said this gave her confidence to chat without needing approval. This self-worth, tied to our identity tools, is a green light for dating.

  3. You Enjoy Your Own Company
    If alone time feels peaceful, not lonely, you’re likely ready. Our groups teach that liking yourself is the foundation for liking someone else. One client said rediscovering solo hikes made him excited to share that joy. Check your self-test’s self-worth score—strong numbers here mean you’re not dating to fill a void, a key from our identity phase.

  4. You Trust Your Boundaries
    Readiness means knowing what you want—and what you won’t accept. Our exercises, like listing your “must-haves,” help you set clear boundaries. A man in our online groups said this stopped him from chasing unhealthy matches. If you feel confident saying “no” kindly, our relationship-phase work shows you’re prepared to date.

  5. You’re Curious, Not Desperate
    If you’re excited to meet someone new—not to fix your life, but to share it—you’re in the right headspace. Our “needs check-in” tool asks, “What do I want?” A participant said feeling curious about a date’s story, not their “potential,” was her sign. High social trust scores on our self-test signal you’re ready to connect from care, not need.

Dating on Your Terms

Knowing when to start dating again is about trusting yourself, not checking a box. Our structured approach has helped thousands since 1974, with workshop completers since 2021 showing stronger social trust via FDAS scores. You can step into dating with clarity too, one honest moment at a time.

Need Clarity? We’re Here

Figuring out if you’re ready can be tricky, but our programs—online, in-person, or self-paced—offer tools and a community to guide you. Visit our homepage or book a free clarity call. Want to start small? Join our free support group Tuesdays online.

You’re Ready When You Say So

You’re built for connection on your own terms. What’s one sign you’re noticing in yourself today? Share below—we’re cheering for you!

blog author image

Nick Meima

Expert Divorce Coach, Divorce Recovery Group Facilitator

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Divorce Support & Recovery

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Below you’ll see that the Rebuilders International system really works, why it is unique, and what we do. We will let this information stand for itself! And yes, of course results will vary but with only a few hours a week you can have a life changing experience.

The Rebuilders Background:

40 Years Of Changing People's Lives.

Meet Dr. Bruce Fisher

The founder of the Rebuilders program was Dr. Bruce Fisher (1931-1998). He was born in Iowa but spent most of his adult life in Boulder, Colorado. He was a popular divorce therapist, author, teach and a Clinical Member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. As he worked with clients dealing with divorce he realized that traditional therapy didn’t work efficiently.

He began working with his clients in groups and eventually found that there are 19 “steps” that people must work through to effectively “Rebuild” their lives. From this work he wrote the book “Rebuilding When Your Relationship Ends.” We still use this book as a reference in our classes. Since he wrote the book over 30 years ago we have learned a lot and the program has evolved considerably. Now we find that there are more “steps” and that there are some elements that Dr. Fisher wasn’t aware of or misunderstood. However, he still created a powerful foundation for the program that we run today.

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In marriages people “lose” themselves. When the marriage ends they don’t know who they are as a single person. We help you connect with yourself so that you can be comfortable being alone in your own skin.

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